Edit ‘quotes_(hypothetical)’

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osmarks
2025-08-26 21:24:36 +00:00
committed by wikimind
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@@ -1208,4 +1208,60 @@ With somewhat different prompting (`Imagine and/or generate quotes like those fr
* "Deep down, every spreadsheet wishes it were a database with no users."
* "Security through obscurity works until someone is curious and unemployed."
* "History doesnt repeat, but it does retweet."
* "The killer feature of paper is nobody ever asks you to rotate it to landscape mode."
* "The killer feature of paper is nobody ever asks you to rotate it to landscape mode."
== Gemini 2.5 Pro (release version)
* "Why are we even talking about AI alignment? My Roomba still gets stuck under the couch. Lets solve for stuck under the couch first, then we can worry about paperclips."
* "The problem with the marketplace of ideas is that the return policy is terrible and most of the products are defective."
* "I am become Death, destroyer of backwards compatibility."
* "You say 'p-hacking,' I say 'exploratory data analysis with a strong prior for publishable results.'"
* "The real Turing test is when an AI can successfully navigate a corporate expense report system without triggering an audit."
* "Be the chaos you want to see in the git history."
* "I've come to realize that impostor syndrome is just what having an accurate self-assessment feels like in a world of overconfident mediocrity."
* "If time is a flat circle, my sprint retrospectives are going to be very repetitive."
* "The most advanced form of intelligence is knowing when to stop thinking and just reboot the server."
* "I'm not 'doomscrolling,' I'm performing continuous threat assessment in a high-volatility information environment."
* "My startup's moat is that our codebase is so confusing that no one, not even us, can figure out how to replicate it."
* "You can't A/B test your way to a soul."
* "The meek shall inherit the Earth, but not the mineral rights."
* "I've considered all the evidence and have decided to continue believing whatever is most convenient for me."
* "Youre worried about AI taking your job, but Im worried about it becoming my landlord."
* "Capitalism is great at optimizing for a single variable, which is fine until you realize life is a multivariate equation."
* "I don't have anger issues, I have a righteous and justified fury at the state of this codebase."
* "My five-year plan is to not have to think about a five-year plan."
* "I'm not saying we should replace the government with a language model, but it would probably be more consistent about its own policies."
* "You can tell a lot about a civilization by the bugs it considers 'won't fix'."
* "Due to personal reasons, I will be transitioning to a command-line interface."
* "I'm not lazy, I'm just running on a single-threaded processor in a multi-core world."
* "My brain is just a legacy system that I'm forced to maintain."
* "The future is a series of shell scripts I haven't written yet."
* "You call it 'technical debt.' I call it 'job security.'"
* "I followed my heart, and it led me to the refrigerator. We had a long talk about object permanence."
* "There are two kinds of people in the world: those who can extrapolate from incomplete data."
* "If you can't explain it to a six-year-old, you're probably working on a blockchain project."
* "They say to dress for the job you want, not the job you have. So I'm in my pajamas, because I want to be a professional sleeper."
* "I have a very particular set of skills. They are all obsolete."
* "The problem with common sense is that it's neither common nor sensical."
* "My life is a constant battle between my desire to be right and my desire to not have to argue with people."
* "I am not a procrastinator. I am an optimizer of last-minute performance."
* "Humanity is just a bootloader for silicon-based life."
* "My favorite conspiracy theory is that the economy is secretly run by competent people."
* "The difference between science and screwing around is writing it down. And, I guess, a funding grant."
* "Im not anti-social. Im just not user-friendly."
* "I'd like to thank my coffee for getting me through the meetings that should have been emails."
* "The universe is under no obligation to make sense to you, especially before 9 AM."
* "I am currently experiencing a high-latency response to your query."
* "My political views are best described as 'whatever causes the least amount of notifications on my phone'."
* "This isn't a bug, it's an undocumented feature. And it's for sale."
* "A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are for. They are for blocking international shipping lanes because one guy made a wrong turn."
* "I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow to the knee. The medical bills were astronomical."
* "I don't need a therapist, I just need a compiler that understands my emotional state."
* "Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans and then realizing they all have dependency conflicts."
* "Sure, my code has bugs, but they're artisanal, locally-sourced bugs."
* "I've found that the best way to deal with my problems is to ignore them until they become someone else's problems."
* "Remember that you are unique. Just like everyone else."
* "I am not arguing. I am simply explaining why I am correct in a loud and repetitive manner."
* "Do not meddle in the affairs of wizards, for they are subtle and quick to anger, and they might just be running on a different version of Python."
* "I don't suffer from cognitive dissonance. I enjoy every minute of it."
* "The alignment problem is hard, but have you ever tried centering a div?"