forked from osmarks/potatOS
107 lines
13 KiB
Markdown
107 lines
13 KiB
Markdown
# PotatOS Privacy Policy
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We at PotatOS are dedicated to providing you with a demonstrably, provably optimal PotatOS experience.
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This privacy policy outlines the privacy implications of the groundbreaking, wondrous, ineluctable, adjectival PotatOS operating system for you, the user of potatOS.
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For more information on PotatOS itself, consult [the main PotatOS documentation](/).
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## Welcome to potatOS!
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PotatOS provides Primarily Otiose Transformative Advanced Technology, Or Something ("PotatOS", "PotatOS™"), associated programs, libraries and other code ("PotatOS Potatosystems"), and PotatOS backend webservices such as SPUDNETv2/PIR, RSAPI, and PSUS ("PotatOS Services"). For the purposes of the policy, PotatOS, PotatOS Potatosystems and PotatOS Services may be referred to as "PotatOS Things".
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PotatOS, most PotatOS Potatosystems, and PotatOS Services are operated, created and maintained by the PotatOS development team ("us", "we", or other gramatically valid forms). Some PotatOS Potatosystems are developed and maintained by third parties, and PotatOS, as a general purpose operating system, may interact with other organizations outside of the scope of this policy.
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This privacy policy ("PotatOS Privacy Policy") sets out how we may use information, such as information gathered via PotatOS and PotatOS Services.
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"PotatOS Privacy Policy" refers collectively to all the terms, conditions and notices contained or referenced in this document, and any associated documentation which may be published by us, including all past and future versions.
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## Information we collect
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PotatOS Things may collect any information which PotatOS Things may collect. This includes information such as:
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* Information you provide. If you provide information, this may be stored and used in order to provide PotatOS™ functionality. This includes information such as settings, which are stored locally so that they can be read and utilized, and your files, if you make files, which are stored on disk and potentially in RAM so that they can be read back and displayed.
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* All user input or all executed code, if some debug settings such as Protocol Epsilon and Extended Monitoring are enabled.
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* Internally generated information which may be indirectly derived from user input, such as your device's UPID[^3], some PotatOS Registry contents and system debug logs.
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* ComputerCraft system configuration information and identification information, which is sent to SPUDNETv2/PIR and stored with incident reports to assist with debugging and/or handling the source of the reports.
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* In certain jurisdictions, we may ask for a valid ID (from accepted countries such as Kazakhstan, the Democratic People's Republic of Korea, Sealand, the Freeish State of Gollarkia, Desmethylway, the Harmonious Jade Dragon Empire, or the Untied States) in limited circumstances. This is only for purposes.
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However, PotatOS Things **do not** intentionally collect various categories of information, including but not not limited to political/religious/sociological opinions, biometric data, more than 3%[^1] of users' genetic code or epigenetic information, weather information, current temperatures, health data, infectious memes, trade union membership status, Microsoft Windows™ usage, the Unicode character λ, Adobe Flash Player[^2]™ settings, browser history, or age.
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For users who are citizens of the European Union, we will now be requesting permission before initiating organ harvesting. This software uses an army of frogs that throw cookies in the general direction of your computer. By using it, you agree that these frogs may throw cookies.
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We may use your data for various purposes, such as:
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* responding appropriately to user input/commands
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* providing and managing mandatory software updates
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* communication with users, where necessary - for example to provide notifications about upcoming events and product announcements
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* [LEVEL 5 CLEARANCE REQUIRED]
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* anything PotatOS Things are programmed to do
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* entertainment and/or random messing around
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* helping to deliver, create, develop, improve, design, operate, manage, produce, modernize, complicate, nationalize, placate, evolve, alter, amend, change, obliterate, or worsen our products and services
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* anything whatsoever
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You are able to opt out of data collection using the following methods:
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* submersion of your computing device in high-temperature molten rocks
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* exposure of your computing device to cacti and potentially other plants
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* ceasing all interaction with your computing device
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* SCP-[DATA LOST]
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* immersion of your computing device in non-high-temperature non-molten rocks, somehow
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* submersion of your computing device in highly acidic, alkaline or based material
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* exposure of your computing device to large amounts of kinetic energy
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* exposure of your computing device to large amounts of psychic energy
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* exposure of your computing device to vacuum or stellar cores
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You may also contact us to have your existing stored data removed, if you are able to verify your relation to this data. We have a lot of it, and it isn't labelled very well.
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We will never sell your data! <span class=spoiler>Nobody wants it much and they can just ask and probably get it for free anyway.</span>
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[^1]: as of 31/11/2019
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[^2]: this may not extend to other Adobe products
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[^3]: Unique PotatOS ID
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## Safety notices
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We wish to remind all users that regardless of recent rumors, potatOS is not responsible for and not associated with SCP-3125. SCP-3125 must not be interacted with. "██████ Siri" (PS#ABB85797) must not be interacted with.
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PotatOS is designed to obey the laws of thermodynamics; if you detect any violations of them, please bring it to our attention. However, some versions of potatOS may not fully obey causality. This is not currently considered a bug.
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THE SOFTWARE IS PROVIDED "AS IS", WITHOUT WARRANTY OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO THE WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY, FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE AND NONINFRINGEMENT. IN NO EVENT SHALL THE AUTHORS OR COPYRIGHT HOLDERS BE LIABLE FOR ANY CLAIM, DAMAGES OR OTHER LIABILITY, WHETHER IN AN ACTION OF CONTRACT, TORT OR OTHERWISE, ARISING FROM, OUT OF OR IN CONNECTION WITH THE SOFTWARE OR THE USE OR OTHER DEALINGS IN THE SOFTWARE.
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Caution: Some assembly required. PotatOS assumes no liability for injuries, accidents, or existential nausea caused by physical or intellectual misuse of PotatOS. PotatOS does not endorse solipsism, and any Ominous Implications™ that result from use of PotatOS™ are not views shared by PotatOS. PotatOS is not beholden to spacetime. PotatOS cannot be forgotten or unlearned.
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By using PotatOS™, you agree to not become an agent of or otherwise aid SCP-3125 and/or associated anomalies.
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The PotatOS Network Systems Division retains the right to utilize orbital laser strikes, memetic kill agents, antimemetic kill agents, memetic death agents, [REDACTED], apiohazards, apiocryohazards, >SQUARE BRACKETS EXPUNGED<, apiomemetohazards, apiopyrohazards, orthoapiohazards, anarchocommunism, arachnocommunism, arachnoanarchocommunism, recreational nuclear weapons, relativistic kinetic kill vehicles, Project TANTALUM IGUANA and derivatives, Mobile Task Force σ-18, Cascading Style Sheets, [[REDACTED] [[DATA EXPUNGED] LOST]], SCP-001-J, GPT-8, the number floor(2pi) (THIS NUMBER MUST NOT BE ACKNOWLEDGED), <span></span>, the PotatOS Privacy Policy, SCP-579, technetium, apioforms, rate limits, SCP-4514, immediate cardiac arrest, a potato with a gun, 7.2kg of melons, no apioforms, User:Heavpoot, EndOS, the internet, <span style="display:inline-block;transform:rotateY(110deg)">this</span>, ████ ████████, unfortunate coincidences, <span class=spoiler>the impending end of the universe</span>, Arch Linux, segmentation faults, cross-site request forgery, triskaidecagons, the borrow checker, !lyricly☭demote☭establish☭communism!, Turing-incompleteness, a description of SCP-3125, bismuth-209, 700 kilotons of cats, antimatter, antiantimatter, O(n<sup>3</sup>) time complexity, Dwarf Fortress, or the character U+202E RIGHT TO LEFT OVERRIDE against users, if it is deemed necessary by the PIERB[^4].
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[^4]: PotatOS Internal Ethical Review Board
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PotatOS is currently, has always been, and always will be, considered nonanomalous. PotatOS is inspired by non-equilibrium thermodynamics.
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## Legal information
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By using potatOS, agreeing to be bound by these terms, misusing potatOS, installing potatOS, reading about potatOS, knowing about these terms, knowing anyone who is bound by these terms, disusing potatOS, reading these terms, or thinking of anything related to these terms, you agree to be bound by these terms both until the last stars in the universe burn out and the last black holes evaporate and retroactively, arbitrarily far into the past. This privacy policy may be updated at any time and at all times the latest revision applies.
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You agree additionally to the following Unicode characters: א U+05D0 HEBREW LETTER ALEF and ⬡ U+2B21[^6] WHITE HEXAGON. A string constant may continue from one line to the next, but the exact contents of such a string are unspecified.
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[^6]: Those who find collisions in hash functions cannot be trusted and may be banned at any time.
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Furthermore: by using PotatOS, you forfeit all claims on your soul by any deity or variations thereof, and pledge yourself in worship to the goddess Discordia, daughter of Night and Darkness. PotatOS is not responsible for any smiting or divine punishments by any angered deities/anomalous theoformic entities/Class-Green reality benders or variations thereof as a result of this agreement. Any legal challenges to this clause must take place in the legal jurisdiction of the court of Pluto, lord of the underworld, or the osmarks.net (or future variations of such) comments section. PotatOS is not responsible for travel arrangements to Avernus.
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This policy supersedes any applicable federal, national, state, and local laws, regulations and ordinances, policies, international treaties, legal agreements, illegal agreements, or any other agreements, contracts, documents, policies, standards or content/information/statements/opinions/preferences that would otherwise apply. If any provision of this policy is found by a court (or other entity) to be unenforceable, it nevertheless remains in force. This policy is legal, not illegal, and a valid legal document in all jurisdictions. This organization is not liable and this agreement shall not be construed. We are not responsible for any issue whatsoever at all arising from use of potatOS, potatOS services, anything at all, or otherwise.
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As an additional clarification to the above clause, this privacy policy supersedes and overrides the "EndOS" and "TaterOS" privacy policies and terms of service regardless of any contradictory claims they may contain. This policy also supersedes all statements made by [GEORGE](https://george.gh0.pw/) or agents thereof.
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You are responsible for anything which potatOS might do to your things. You ran it. It is all your fault. <span class=spoiler>The turtle is watching you</span>. We are not liable, ethically, morally, existentially, financially or legally, for anything whatsoever.
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You agree that your mind, thoughts, soul and other distinguishing characteristics may be repurposed/utilized at any time for the training of GPT-██ or other artificial intelligences at the discretion of the PotatOS Advanced Projects team. You also agree that your soul may be temporarily[^5] be placed into various apioformic entities (see Appendix 6.7) for various purposes³. You can opt out of this by being soulless and an empty husk of what you once were. You are permitted to maintain consciousness as long as this does not negatively affect PotatOS™ operations. You agree that you either are a robot or may be converted into one if it is deemed necessary.
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[^5]: this can take anywhere from 3.2 µs to 10<sup>32</sup> teraseconds
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Moreover, Heavpoot (discord ID 160279332454006795, UPID #89VJZ9AK:☭934) is to be considered co-owner of the totality of existence and/or the universe. "Andrew" (Discord ID 543131534685765673, UPID 6ec3837b5260g4b9d█22029e7b474█d63 is at all times incorrect in his beliefs and/or statements, unless this would contradict with other clauses of this policy and/or cause harm to PotatOS or us.
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Any "dibs" you make may be transferred to us at our discretion. You agree that this statement is false.
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The software includes Adobe Flash Player that is licensed under terms from Adobe Systems Incorporated. Adobe and Flash are either registered trademarks or trademarks of Adobe Systems Incorporated in the United States and/or other countries.
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In all situations, the government of PotatOS will take the normatively correct action.
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## Summary
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If any aspect is not utterly harmonious, gratefully bring it to our notice and we shall strive to earn your satisfaction.
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Enjoy the PotatOS™ Experience™!
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