139 lines
5.1 KiB
JavaScript
139 lines
5.1 KiB
JavaScript
const irc = require("irc-upd")
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const childProcess = require("child_process")
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const syllables = require("syllable")
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const R = require("ramda")
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const pluralize = require("pluralize")
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const { DB, SQL } = require("./db")
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var client = new irc.Client(process.argv[2] || "irc.osmarks.net", "testbot", {
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channels: ["#a", "#botrobots", "#b"],
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userName: "testbot",
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encoding: "utf8",
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port: 6667
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});
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let links = null
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let linksResolve = null
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const logEv = (ty, thing) => SQL`INSERT INTO thing_log (timestamp, type, thing) VALUES (${Date.now()}, ${ty}, ${thing})`.run()
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const scanlinks = () => {
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return new Promise(resolve => {
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if (!linksResolve) {
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client.send("LINKS")
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linksResolve = [resolve]
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links = []
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} else {
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linksResolve.push(resolve)
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}
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})
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}
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let sylhist = []
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let mhist = []
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// pluralize seems to drop unicode sometimes
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// hackily cope with this
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const safelyOperate = (s, fn) => {
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let res = fn(s)
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if (res.trim() === "") { return s }
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return res
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}
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const handleOf = (thing, fn) => {
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const ofsplt = /^(.*)\W+of\W+(.*)$/.exec(thing)
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if (ofsplt) {
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return `${fn(ofsplt[1])} of ${ofsplt[2]}`
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} else {
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return fn(thing)
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}
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}
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const renderItem = x => x.quantity === 1 ? x.thing : `${x.quantity} ${handleOf(x.thing, pluralize.plural)}`
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client.addListener("message", (nick, channel, message, ev) => {
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const e = /^<([^>]+)> (.*)$/.exec(message)
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if (e) {
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nick = e[1]
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message = e[2]
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}
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const res = /^([A-Za-z0-9_-]+)[:, ]*([A-Za-z0-9_-]+) *(.*)$/.exec(message)
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if (res) {
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let [_, tnick, cmd, args] = res
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tnick = tnick.toLowerCase()
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args = args.trim().replace(/[.!?]$/, "")
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cmd = cmd.toLowerCase()
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if (tnick === client.nick) {
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console.log(nick, cmd, channel)
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if (cmd === "starch") {
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client.say(channel, `starch exists (${Math.random() * 20 + 80}% confidence).`)
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} else if (cmd === "stats") {
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client.say(channel, "haha no")
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} else if (cmd === "help") {
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client.say(channel, "nobody can help you now")
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} else if (cmd === "fortune") {
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childProcess.exec("fortune", (err, out) => {
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if (err) { return console.warn(err) }
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client.say(channel, out)
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})
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} else if (cmd === "cat") {
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client.say(channel, "meow")
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} else if (cmd === "servers") {
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scanlinks().then(links => client.say(channel, links.map(x => `${x[1]}: ${/^[0-9]+ (.*)$/.exec(x[3])[1]}`).join("\n")))
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} else if (cmd === "take" || cmd === "have") {
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const things = args.split(/(,| and )/).map(x => x.trim().replace(",", "").replace(/^(an?|the) /, "")).filter(x => x !== "" && x !== "and")
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for (let thing of things) {
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let qty = 1
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const res = /^([-0-9.]+|some|many|half)\b\s*(.*)$/iu.exec(thing)
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if (res) {
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const [_, rrqty, rthing] = res
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thing = rthing
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const rqty = rrqty.toLowerCase()
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if (rqty === "some") {
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qty = Math.floor(Math.random() * 17)
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} else if (rqty === "many") {
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qty = Math.floor(Math.random() * 2300)
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} else if (rqty === "half") {
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qty = 0.5
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} else {
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qty = parseFloat(rqty)
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}
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}
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thing = handleOf(thing, pluralize.singular)
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const currQty = SQL`SELECT * FROM inventory WHERE thing = ${thing}`.get()?.quantity
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if (currQty) { qty += currQty }
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qty = qty || 0
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SQL`INSERT OR REPLACE INTO inventory VALUES (${thing}, ${Date.now()}, ${qty})`.run()
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console.log("attained", qty, thing)
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client.say(channel, `I have ${renderItem({ thing, quantity: qty })}.`)
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}
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} else if (cmd.startsWith("inv")) {
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const inv = SQL`SELECT * FROM inventory ORDER BY obtained_at DESC LIMIT 10`.all()
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client.say(channel, inv.map(renderItem).join("\n"))
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} else if (cmd === "deploy") {
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client.say(channel, `Deploying ${args}`)
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}
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}
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}
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const messageContent = message.replace(/^(\s*[<\[][A-Za-z0-9_-]+[>\]]\s*)+/, "")
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sylhist = R.takeLast(3, R.append(syllables(messageContent), sylhist))
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mhist = R.takeLast(50, R.append(messageContent, mhist))
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if (R.equals(sylhist, [5, 7, 5])) {
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client.say(channel, "haiku detected!")
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logEv("haiku", R.takeLast(3, mhist).join("\n"))
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}
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console.log(sylhist)
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})
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client.addListener("raw", ev => {
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if (ev.command === "rpl_links") {
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links.push(ev.args)
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} else if (ev.command === "rpl_endoflinks" && linksResolve) {
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linksResolve.forEach(r => r(links))
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linksResolve = null
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links = []
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}
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})
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